as alive as you need me to be
Wait, we have one of those?
Genuienly had no idea.
This is a great example of the kinds of problems that can crop up.
Fish doesn't realize its swimming in water, kind of thing.
One approach is basically just gaslighting you:
The things that bother you and cause you trouble... well they just shouldn't, and you should be fine with that.
The other approach is.... you know, actually diagnostic, and can lead to... actually useful diagnosis, and thus more specified therapy and potentially other kinds of help.
As an autist, I've gone through many similar situations.
Sex/Gender independent... just 90% of therapists don't get it all. Always try to diagnose me with something else, and its different every time.
Doesn't matter that I've done the full RAADS V test and I'm basically off thr charts autistic, rofl.
Half of them have never even heard of it, don't know anything about how diagnosing or providing help to an autistic person works at all, tend to think all autists are low functioning with very severe, general social deficits.
Then I get stuck on ... well they will rephrsse what I just said, and say/ask it back to me, and I'll say no, no I phrased what I said specifically, because I meant exactly that.
Then I see in their notes later that I am 'arguementative' or 'agitated' or 'aggressive'... far, fsr more often if its a woman psych/soc worker/counselor who I am... not even 'correcting', just trying to not have them put words in my mouth.
Men tend to be less intimidated and more open to my insistance that I meant exactly what I said... and I am talking in the same voice, same mannerisms, same everything, with everyone.
Some women get it, most don't, some men get it, most don't.
... But the field is vastly disproportionately populated with women.
So the end result for a lot of guys is... hey look, another woman that isn't really listening to me.
Wow thanks, I never would have thought of that!!!!
Oh jeez, the copay is... $80 bucks?
Boy, I could have just looked that up on the interwebz... uh, outside, of course, on a laptop.
The performative masculinity of many men is also reinforced by partriarchichal norms in many women, who consistently belittle men who attempt to express their emotions without judgement, who demand macho men, who belittle men who aren't financially better off than them.
Men can't talk to most men, and they can't talk to most women, society in general still largely demands they conform to the 'bottle it all in, buck up and deal with it' norm that is so very obviously harmful to men, and whoever they eventually take it out on when they have a breakdown.
... These are broad generalizations, but they are still broadly accurate.
Yep, the psychology industry/field has been unfair to women for a long, long time, often hideously so.
But no widespread progress on deconstructing and at least softening male machismo norms will be possible until we as a society acknowledge that... men are not the only sex/gender that often have ingrained patriarchal norms.
I go to a therapist and she treats me like a five year old.
I can literally just read her basic CBT training online, its not hard to find.
Then I do the excercises at home.
CBT being basically the only kind of approach to therapy that is actually empirically shown to reliably actually help most people.
Oh, you're seeking an therapist qualified and specialized for high functioning autists?
There aren't any in the state anymore.
...
I also think that using ChatGPT as a therapist is a fucking horrible idea, but uh, therapy in America is expensive, and often shit quality, oh and they just hand out pills that you'll become dependent on, willy nilly, as opposed to trying everything else first and using that as a last resort.
I still haven't forgiven Krugman for arguing for bailing out the banks in the 07/08 crisis/crash...
(We could have say, done that, but put all their boards in Federal Prison, maybe put them into some kind of mandatory recievership/government control, restructure, maybe break em up a bit anti trust style, then let em go a few years later... with new boards, and strings attached... or just let them all implode back then, no Bernanke put, yeah it would have sucked but hey, look at where we are now, the entire corporate world ~20 years down the road of being insanely mismanaged, hyperprofit seeking, unable to function without very low interest rates... and now the debt is much worse, the economy is going to crash much harder, and we're done being the workd reserve currency, and we'll be lucky not to hyperinflate/default on our debt and basically have no substantial FDI for a generation...)
But it doesn't matter, because any even semi-reasonable economist who isn't a complete free market extremist ideological wacko can point out what Paul's pointing out here.
Ah, see, I'm not an accelerationist because I am not within the top 10% of the wealth holders in my society, I am in fact disabled and crippled, and thus stand a very, very good chance at dying fairly quickly if the entire national (and to a great extent, world) economy suddenly collapses.
If you think the pain and suffering is bad now... and don't get me wrong, it is...
Well, multiply it by between 100x to 1000x, thats what a completely uncontrolled or horrendously mismanaged economic collapse will do.
Rampant homeless and famine. Massively increased military adventurism. Migrant Crises.
I'd rather uh, not make things even worse, for billions of people, cause tens to hundreds of millions of unnecessary deaths?
Like, you do realize that all the hypercapitalist tech bro accelerationists... they're the ones that invented, popularized, and push the modern concept of accelerationism, right?
Because they'll emerge as kings.
And most of us will just die, or become slaves.
Because they will be trained on what all of those people say, and then they will also make nonsense mistakes that don't even make sense according to that logic.
Kinda like how Trump has a fundamentally nonsensical economic policy, because he doesn't understand the underlying dynamics, he just knows the surface level rhetoric for a slew of policy positions, which when taken altogether at the same time, are mutually contradictory and inconsistent.
That'll be the level of logic you're plugging directly into the even more arcane and technically complex fields of large scale finance and accounting.
It would blow things up even faster, and from a more fundamental level.
We are already on the way to the dollar collapsing and the us defaulting on its debt.
Putting a bunch of overconfident, gaslighting autocorrect algos inside the fundamental workings of the finanical system would accelerate that process.
Please remember these LLMs hallucinate evidence and facts that are not real all the time, they have no capacity to reason nor analyze, they can only synthesize the average of whatever their algo determines is relevant to your input to them.
This could very easily lead to widespread, 0 trust in the reliability of any reported numbers or metrics of anything that uses LLMs, and generally speaking, when people lose confidence it the legitimacy of a financial organization's books... well that organization gets shorted, dumped, bank runs, etc.
Would you trust an LLM to manage your own monthly budget numbers and categorize things properly?
These things couldn't even figure out how many r's are in strawberry untill fairly recently.
Oh fuck, we are beyond fucked.
Yep, lets just hook up shitty LLMs to the world's financial system, what could possibly go wrong?!
Yeah they can do that because they basically never remove anything, and just keep piling more and more nonsense on top of it.
Also, cough WINE, cough Proton.
So... what Seattle does in the International District is this:
Street names are written in both English, and... Mandarin, Japanese, Vietnamese.
Sometimes its two different signs, sometimes its one big sign.
I... don't really see how just putting a sign that writes it out in both languages... is not a reasonable solution to this scenario?
But that doesn't really even appear to be the main issue going on here.
...
As a person who has maintained large databases... yeah, it is... possible to implement support for nonstandard characters... but you would have to very, very directly legally require this specific level of support, and probably have a lot of lead time.
Not saying its morally right or justifiable, but the industry standard is almost always to just support the very basic, bare minimum of charsets... and then everything is built on top of that assumption, and the actual core setup configs at that level haven't been touched in 20+ years, and probably there's only 2 people at the entire org that even know... that such things exist, or what actual physical server they are running on.
It can be a bitch and a half to fundamentally rework an entire database system to support and uncommon character set, usually security minded practices will have you scrubbing out or charswapping or banning anything that isn't standard... and if there is any link in the chain, at any point, that doesn't properly support your new charset, well, it all blows up.
So... that is everything from front end to backend that has to come up with a solution, and the reality is, for just most of such modern software systems... that means you're going through god knows how many vendors and liscensed software, and now they all have to be compliant as well, in more or less exactly the same way.
Anyway, NAPA does exist in at least comprehensive character standards:
https://www.iana.org/assignments/language-subtag-registry/language-subtag-registry
Type: variant
Subtag: fonnapa
Description: North American Phonetic Alphabet
Description: Americanist Phonetic Notation
Added: 2016-06-24
So it should be theoretically possible.
...
Another... weird aspect to this is... NAPA is not like the actual written characters that the Musqueam, or any other Peoples of the Salish Sea... actually ever used, historically.
It is a modern, academic alphabet, similar to IPA, primarily developed out of trying to basically reverse engineer almost entirely oral, spoken languages.
It is not something any of them ever historically used as a written character set, outside of modern academia and modern attempts to revive various languages of various peoples, to encourage their use and prevent the languages from going extinct.
Similar to NAPA is Saanich, or SENĆOŦEN, or Sənčáθən.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saanich_dialect
This writing system is used by the some of the Saanich peoples, academics and modern language revival movements... very roughly speaking, the Saanich peoples/languages are a subset of the broader group of Salish peoples/languages
...
Another problem with this realm is that... there is no 100% respected as an authority standard on how exactly to use or implement exactly which characters in NAPA to represent exactly which sounds... so... different specific Peoples, Tribes, Academics, etc, may be using different characters within NAPA for the same sound.
Its all very confusing from the standpoint of a database / data entry software dev trying to figure out how to actually implement this.
Because the most important thing to a Boomer is the identity of a victim who had it tougher than you and 'turned out fine', and you should stop whining and be grateful for everything you've been given, because your effort is always inferior to their effort, by definition.
They literally cannot cognitively concieve of the concept that they can be wrong or make mistakes or ever have made a wrong decision or supported a bad idea.
They are literally suicidally vain, they would rather be in a constant state of paranoid fear, delusion and confusion, and vote in people who literally will kill them by proxy by taking away their health, housing, retirement and food benefits... and then they'll demand their children take care of them.
Why do you think there is a whole social media trend of adult kids going no contact with their boomer parents?
They're absurdly delusional sociopathic narcissists.
(Disclaimer: I do not mean literally every single Boomer, obviously there are many who are not like this and are great people who've been trying to stop this madness most of their adult lives... but yeah, overall? The generation that grew up in the most freakishly abnormal explosion of broad societal wealth increase, class mobility and technological progress in the history of the country, possible the entire world... uh yeah, their frame of reference for 'normal' is an anomalous and basically unorecedented event in the known history of economics, and that has royally fucked up their perspective.)
(Barring what China's managed to do in the last 40ish years, anyway)
(Also, the main reason this economic boom occured was because post WW2, basically every single other advanced industrial society had been bombed into oblivion, and the US was the only country that could make shit at scale. Thats it.)
Its the dying gasp of American Exceptionalism, at this point.
Ultra right wing types? My guns will save me!
No they fucking won't, not if big daddy government decides to fuck you specifically, they have more people, more ammo, more guns, armored personel carriers and astonishingly better intel than you do.
Liberals? The law will function and stop this! The system will hold!
Ahem, obviously false.
Both of these are ultimately aspects of American society that are drilled into our heads as being exceptional, unique, and basically better than anywhere else on Earth.
Again, obviously false, in its totality, as basically every aspect of that system is now totally unravelling.
We are not facing a crisis, as if its in the future tense.
We have been in the crisis since Jan 6th....
Our entire legal system is now utterly arbitrary.
This ruling means that Trump can issue an EO to break any law, and no judge can immediately order it stop.... it all has to be drawn out in court for years, by which time, the Executive Branch will just have done whatever the fuck it wanted to.
Even if a case is won after some time... and concludes that agents of the Executive Branch did actually break laws, Trump can pardon all of them instantly.
Trump has just effectively done a line item veto on the 14th Amendment.
He can now do that with any other Amendment or law as well.
The law is dead.
... and this is why I don't use bluetooth on anything.
I fucking called this after the Crowd Strike catastrophe.
MSFT would start massively reworking their entire concept of who actually gets kernel access, because uh, causing a Y2K event is uh, really bad, actually.... and yep, that probably means the kernel level AC paradigm is no longer workable.
Fucking obviously duh, wow, turns out just letting any old 'vetted' vendor submit goddamned kernel level code updates without being strenuously verified each time is a bad fucking idea, wow, who could have guessed??!?
Welcome to approximately 40% of people in the US.
I would recommend introducin the son to a literal lemon in real life prior to playing Portal 2.
... probably goes the same for a p0taTo.
Ever wonder why the uh, default cop idle stance, the at ease stance.... is each hand up at it's shoulder, elbows bent, in front of chest?
Because that way they can very, very easily, and casually, bump their chestcam, obsure its view, muffle the sound.
"In all forms of strategy, it is necessary to maintain the combat stance in everyday life and to make your everyday stance your combat stance."
- Miyamoto Musashi, The Book of Five Rings.
I completely agree, its just...
My autistic brain just... I can't immediately grasp the idea that most people just do not bother to look into things in detail, most people have no innate drive to... investigate whether or not what they believe is actually correct.
I'm not saying you have to be autistic to want to be factually correct, to want to fully investigate things so as to not believe and repeat bullshit...
But I am saying that my mind just... I always have to consciously step back and go... oh, right, most people are just vibes based, about literally everything, they don't have an automatic 'wait, am i actually correct?' mechanism built in as a check to 99% of what they see and believe.
My brain has analytical logic mode, and... social mode. What actually, mechanistically makes sense, vs... what do most people actually act like?
I can either approach things in either of these two ways, but when I start to try and mix both, I get frustrated by very obvious and apparent hyprocrisies and inconsistencies everywhere, very quickly.
Oh I mean, I'm honestly fine.
Had some real bad PTSD style flashback shit for a while, from being homeless for roughly 2 years, still jump at sudden noises and lights, but I've been that way forever, yay for abusive family growing up...
But I only recently did a full check in with all kinds of medical specialists to reorient after I finally stopped being homeless, found a shithole that ain't too shitty, that I can afford to rent... literally, I just wanted a paper copy of the CBT procedures, because they've worked well, honestly very well for me in the past...
And I now have numerous physical injuries from being homeless so long, getting the shit kicked out of me every other week, getting my shit stolen every other day, almost dying from now both a blizzard and a heat wave... SSDI needs you to actually have current medical contacts so they can pull records from them... and I had to get as much of my old MyChart files back together, I don't even remember how many phones I had that kept getting stolen, email accounts I lost access to.
I appreciate the suggestion, but I seriously have never been as mentally free of stress as I am now:
All I gotta do is focus on PT, then try to either get back to a job or start my own software freelancing gig... maybe make a video game... just gotta heal up my wrist and leg and back and ass a bit more, so I can actually sit and type at a 'puter for more than 15 minutes at a time w/o terrible pain.
I honestly love being a hermit, away from my abusive family... I'm not lonely at all, I love the solitude, lemmy is really 95% of what I need for social interactions and excercising my own brain, and of course every once in a while, I hobble with my cane down and chit chat with a neighbor or two.
Basically, nearly everyone in my life I've ever trusted or loved has abused or manipulated me in some way... not literally all, of course, but the vast, vast majority... so fuck em.
Im happier off without em, and I now literally know that I can keep myself alive in the absolute worst possible situation... but, I'm still 95% immobile, don't have a car anymore, that got stolen, so its not like I could meet people and have a real social life anyway.
Gotta heal the body first, literally get back on my feet. Been fixing up my financial situation best I can while I'm mostly bed ridden.
PTSD attacks and night terrors ... and that instant jump to 'ready to defend myself with potentially lethal force'... yeah, that's dissapated significantly with the CBT excercises, and simply having my own, controlled environment, with relatively little external responsibilities... just took time.