The world isn't real. This is simply too ridiculous to have happened. I have been in a coma for the last six years and this is all just a weird fantasy playing out in my mind.
Don't post the Daily Fail on here. The only differences between that and Fox News are that it's British and that you need to be able to read in order to use it.
Well, there are four reasons why even by modern standards that would have been a good idea.