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Like the wind...

@ TokenEffort @sh.itjust.works

Posts
47
Comments
352
Joined
2 yr. ago

I'm only alive because successfully killing myself is hard. Bernadette, she/her, smash bros addict, dog person, work addict, ruined beyond repair, stuck in the past. I will defend Amazon and Nintendo like they're the parents I never had. They did, and will do, nothing wrong, ever.

  • What was your "one that got away" and where are they now?

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  • The community that is assigned to me is incredibly bigoted. Anti LGBT, antisemitic, Islamophobic, racist, xenophobic, ableist, you name it, it's turned up to 11 in there.

    On the outside we're made to look so welcoming to our "brothers and sisters" but in reality it's a war zone.

    THEY treat cis name changes like it's worse than genocide, and once again I've normalized something no one else experiences. God I wish I was white

  • What was your "one that got away" and where are they now?

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  • Changing from a "black name" to a common American name is controversial. You're supposed to be proud of the African equivalent to Renesmeeigh. Everyone thinks it's "pretty" and "righteous" and "meaningful" and I just have self hatred. I actually grew to love myself after getting rid of that ugly crap.

    You're right, I am terrible for not wanting a slavery tradition as my name. I refuse to live as a victim of suffering I've never endured. I was not a slave or a child of a slave. I'm American as fuck, give me an American name.

  • What was your "one that got away" and where are they now?

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  • You can only have either a cis name change or all the people in your life, not both.

  • What was your "one that got away" and where are they now?

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  • Asking a cop how to take the safety off a gun so I can commit a mass shooting is easier and will result in a better outcome

  • What was your "one that got away" and where are they now?

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  • What world do you live in where it's that easy? If I'm not married or transgender then I might as well have dropped those bombs in Japan. I had friends who genuinely liked me but would not have respected my name change. Even simply having a preferred name in high school was horrible, they'd rather struggle with with stupid tragedeigh grossness that family's mother stuck on me.

  • What was your "one that got away" and where are they now?

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  • Either you cut all the ties you've ever had or everyone you know isn't so vehemently transphobic that a CIS person who changed their name is more offensive than committing a hundred 9/11s in every country, AND the trans people you know don't assume you just want to be oppressed and changed your name for attention. Changing my name meant cutting all ties.

  • What was your "one that got away" and where are they now?

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  • Who knows. I let her get away despite us being pretty close friends. I think about her, I regret ditching her, but then I remember that not ditching her would mean I'd have to explain why I changed my name and I'd rather suck off a polar bear. Cis name changes are worse than genocide.

  • Why is everyone vehemently against easier lives?

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  • Gray

  • Why is everyone vehemently against easier lives?

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  • They'd still manually go shopping instead of ordering online for literally the same price or a literally trivial higher amount. Like imagine going in person to buy toilet paper for one and a half dollars cheaper than buying online. Like bro you spent more than 1.5 USD in GAS or public transit going there bruh!

    I normalized my crazy mother. Seems like everyone isn't my crazy mother which is a good thing. I don't wish my childhood on anyone. Imagine having the resources to live a better life and have more experiences, and NEVER getting them, and you're not allowed to complain. Imagine being the stinky kid, and being unable to NOT be the stinky kid. You know why you're stinky, but calling out your mother makes you spoiled and entitled.

  • Why is everyone vehemently against easier lives?

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  • I'm not, it's just my childhood is so crazy that it seems like a joke. That family suffered so much when they didn't need to. A relative spent her whole life suffering, and now she died from cancer. The most fun thing she did was play candycrush. That family's mother is worse than I thought.

    But honestly, it's so validating that I suffered unnecessarily because of her. I've had the family and everyone say that I was the problem. I was the reason why I was a filthy kid who only showered with water. I was the reason why I had no lunch for school or juice at home. I was the reason why I'd come to school sick and spread the illness around.

    They only saw the price tags on my clothes and assumed I chose those clothes. I never liked brand clothes, and if I had the choice, I'd get unbranded stuff and FUCKING BUY BODY WASH AND LUNCH INSTEAD! Like today! Where I NEVER run out of body wash! And I have something to drink all the time now that childhood is over and I CAN WORK! Fuck childhood. Thanks Amazon!

  • Why is everyone vehemently against easier lives?

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  • Slow.

    I'm saying, Costco customers are moving slow as shit because the store is crowded. When they could just order online instead of buying a membership for the privilege of basically sitting in traffic with shopping carts.

    You don't NEED to pay yearly for Amazon prime. And at the time I made multiple accounts and used the free trial on each. AND gift cards from surveys apps.

  • Why is everyone vehemently against easier lives?

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  • Yeah, being spit on and manhandled by adults as a 7 year old kid every other day in "school" does that to you. You're broke? But your shirt has a man on a horse! You're rich and spoiled. How could you have ran out of soap months ago when you're wearing a polo ralphy whatever shirt? Maybe get less Airopostale and buy soap, so easy!

    Yeah, thing is, my mother would spend a couple of grands on stupid ugly brand clothes, while screaming at me to shut up about body wash and juice. It's "why do you come to school smelling horrendous" AND "why do you think you deserve body wash when there are people who have nothing?"

    Today I wear ZERO brands and I finally get to shower with soap, drink juice, and brush my teeth with toothpaste. Childhood is the worst part of life.

  • Why is everyone vehemently against easier lives?

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  • Cars are unnecessary money pits that can be replaced.

    When you're stuck in traffic, think about how that is normalized.

  • Why is everyone vehemently against easier lives?

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  • No I grew up neglected by family, abused in an institution, and dehumanized by society until I changed my name 3 years ago. I also hate cars.

  • Why is everyone vehemently against easier lives?

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  • No, just remembering horrible experiences. I hate that family and that family's mother more.

  • Why is everyone vehemently against easier lives?

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  • I know that obviously. Those people aren't doing that crazy shit. But they can make life easier with planned meals and an easy routine, why deliberately make your life harder?

    And this just reminds me of how that fucking bitch took so much food from food banks and never used it ffs. Every Monday a church had an open pantry, that bitch forced everyone to go stand in line separately to get extra. I hated standing in lines so I'd spend every Monday at a library until 7pm and take the long way home for 2 hours. I never actually saw the pantry or what came from it, just the line.

    I was abused and neglected as a kid. I had brand name clothes, but smelled bad and only ever ate top ramen and cup noodles. All of that wasted produce was that woman's. DRINKS were never available. No juice, tea, etc. If I was thirsty I would pretend to shower or wash my hands and drink the bathroom water.

    I was institutionalized for a disorder I never had. That woman lied to get me in the institution, and they made me stagnate and regress. I've only lived 3 years of my 27 year life. No one believed I was neglected because mommy is rich and I have clothes with old men's names on them. They'd assume the 8 year old kid is at fault for having no lunch, no signed permission slips, bad BO, filthy hair, etc. Like I chose to be that way. How can I be suffering when my shirt says Abercrombie? Neglect from rich parents is horrendous.

    I couldn't buy my own body wash until I started doing paid surveys at 15 years old (lied my age on PayPal and the site) and dog sitting at 17 on wag & rover. Before that, I used to steal the trial sizes and stretch them as long as I could.

    So I'm fighting CPTSD and trying to cut ties and move out. Praise Amazon.

  • Why is everyone vehemently against easier lives?

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  • They agree with that family's mother.

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  • Honestly in my area cyclists are hated more than Osama bin Laden so I can sort of relate to it being unsafe. I know being in a car would be way worse for my mental health though. Do what's safe and easiest, and never forget what car companies stole from you. Cars ruined your city, so big companies can get more money. Big companies selling an inferior travel method. Cars are primitive, reliable eco friendly public transit is the future.

  • Why is everyone vehemently against easier lives?

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  • I don't think i was saved. I was saved.

    And it's not only about subscribe & save, but other solutions. I just feel super alone like everyone wants to have hours of chores instead of making them easier. There are solutions that cost nothing, like having an easy routine or combining a chore with something you do every day. Like, just taking out the trash earlier in the day costs nothing. But family insists on keeping themselves awake waiting until 11:59:59PM to take out the trash which takes hours because one person keeps over-overbuying produce and never using it all. Like, buy less of it, and take out the trash earlier. That SAVES money for fucks sake

  • Why is everyone vehemently against easier lives?

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  • Bro I'm fucking insane