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GrayBackgroundMusic

@ GrayBackgroundMusic @lemm.ee

Posts
41
Comments
106
Joined
3 yr. ago

  • How can I let go of the anger and sadness towards my father?

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  • Why would you want to fix it if he constantly pushes your boundaries purposely?

    I'm not OP, but I have similar issues. I ask myself this CONSTANTLY. There's a part of me that is a hole that a proper, good father could fill. Obviously, I don't have that and he never will, but I still crave it. Imagine being hungry and there's the best food on the other side of the window and you can never have any. You're still hungry and there's a part of you that is pressing against that window, even though another part of you knows you can't get into the store.

  • How can I let go of the anger and sadness towards my father?

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  • One of the pivotal moments for me was on my wedding day. I didn’t receive any message from him—not even a simple acknowledgment. I had hoped to hear from him, and his silence cut deeply, making me realize how distant we had become.

    One year, my father said he didn't think he could visit. I have his only grandkids. He's retired and rich. He has connections to get cheap travel. He takes multiple out-of-country trips a year (that I've never been on). There is literally no reasonable explanation why he can't visit in a year and plenty of typical reasons for him to do so. I haven't talked to him in more than 5 years.

    My anger/sadness dulls with time, but never goes away. I constantly have to remind myself that the father I want doesn't exist and never did. It has gotten easier with time, but it's still a scar. Just like a real scar, it gets angry from time to time, but it's not as bad as when I first got it.

    It's taught me a lot of lessons. It taught me not to be like him. My mom once asked my wife "where did he learn to play with the kids like that? His father never did that." When my wife told me that, I couldn't explain it, either. I just treat my kids like I wanted to be treated when I was a kid.

    I've gone to therapy and it helps. Maybe I should go back. As my kids grow, I'm learning new ways in which he failed me and our family. I never knew what I was missing, but now that I have to provide that for my kids, I see what he did wrong. Every year it's something new. I imagine it'll be that way until I die.

    So, I'm sorry, but I don't think it ever disappears (as you can tell by the energy I'm typing with). I think it fades. Take from it the lessons that you can. Don't let the pain be fruitless. Acknowledge it, use it as guidance, "I know what not to do."

  • Growing Up [SMBC]

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  • Thanks

  • Growing Up [SMBC]

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  • Is the kid version pulling on a pony tail or pushing up a stick?

  • If money was not an issue, is there a movie, series, or a video game you would fund as a passion project with no intention on making a profit on it?

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  • Series? More macross/robotech that makes sense. Macross Plus is the best for many reasons, but mostly because of the coherent plot. Give me awesome mecha, itano circus missile flights, and a plot that's not fucking stupid. (I can't stand robotech's plot, and macross is barely tolerable.)

    Game? Master of Magic 2 that doesn't suck. I've seen 2 or 3 spiritual successors but they've failed in execution. Keep it simple. Update the original and add a touch of something. Don't reinvent it.

    Movie? District 9 sequel. I don't know how they'd do it but the movie was so good I want more.

  • If money was not an issue, is there a movie, series, or a video game you would fund as a passion project with no intention on making a profit on it?

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  • Yes. More Eternal Darkness. Loved the replay ability. ULYOTTH CHTURGAH PARGON

  • If you could improve PeerTube, what would you improve?

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  • What is peer tube? Honest questions

  • Does anyone else have a negative perception of a product/service solely because of spam advertising?

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  • Anything advertised by a YouTuber. Some mattress company, some VPN, etc

  • Removed

    In what ways are you self-indulgent?

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  • Specialty coffee. I order whole beans from a roaster I know. It's $20-25/lb. I could buy grocery store coffee for half that, but it doesn't taste anywhere close.

  • When your garage is REALLY cold

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  • ~9C. The MINTEMP is 10C, I think. I heat it to 11C with a heat gun and it works fine.

  • Locked

    How can you filter out certain content on lemmy?

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  • You can't do that on the web client. You have to find another app.

    IIRC, it's slated to be added, but hasn't been yet.

  • What's a good way to get instantly isekaied from your job?

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  • All our took for me was being too highly paid, I think. Lay offs came and I went. Literally about to present the closing slides for the current phase of a massive project. Was so sure I was safe because of said critical project and was well regarded on my team. (I brought cookies even!) Maybe I was, maybe I wasn't. I was, however, the highest paid in my department.

  • What HATED or highly disliked movie you ACTUALLY really enjoyed?

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  • The desert bazaar sequence was actually tolerable.

    But yes, the art department deserves full recognition.

  • What successful or popular movie that many loved you just HATE?

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  • And the problem is further minimized when smart hulk is revealed with no effort at all in the next film. I hated it.

  • What successful or popular movie that many loved you just HATE?

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  • I find nuggets in them. Iron man 3 had issues, but I was fascinated by the portrayal of Tony stark's ptsd after the battle of new York. Sure, seeing a bunch of robots is fun, but it's not really engaging. The intersection of everyday life, mental trauma, and super powers and responsibilities is fascinating to me.

  • What successful or popular movie that many loved you just HATE?

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  • Ready player 1 - oh yeah, I agree with you. Garbage film. Just an excuse to do fan service. I viewed it like a music video or clip compilation. It was neat to see all the random franchise together on the big screen but worthless as a narrative. I enjoyed it like I enjoy godzilla films, turn brain off, watch the spectacle.

    I hate Avatar (blue cat people). Dances with Wolves but Halo. It was pretty! However people seem to act like it was an actual film and not a tech demo. They literally called the mineral unobtanium. It's a meme. Smh.

  • What's that Christmas/Holiday song that's your jam - and what's the song you must turn off?

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  • Avoid - last Christmas. It's not a Christmas song. It just happens to be at that time of year. It's depressing and whiney and over played (even if it wasn't irrelevant).

  • What do you want for Christmas but you probably won't get?

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  • Peace and quiet. I usually end up cleaning more than anyone and regulating my kids emotions. I get a break when they go to school. Now they're home for 2 weeks. I miss when they were younger. It was far simpler.

  • Deleted

    Permanently Deleted

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  • I can only dream that people would care about me enough to do such things. Most people barely acknowledge my existence.

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