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FRYD

@ FRYD @sh.itjust.works

Posts
1
Comments
151
Joined
2 yr. ago

Ugh I posted a selfie, so I guess I’ll do a somewhat real bio now that I’m not a mystery person anymore :/

  • Trans woman (she/her)
  • Photographer
  • Fashion addict
  • Occasional techie
  • Friendly (feel free to reach out)

  • How do you decide if you are living a “good life?”

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  • I used to say my goal is to live hard and die young. I’m not so nihilistic anymore, but I’d still say I’m living a good life if I’m pushing myself to my limits to have fun and experience new things.

  • What’s your favorite sad song?

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  • Keia by Colliding With Mars

  • What are your Valentine's Day plans?

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  • Me and my partner are going a little punk rock show in a bowling alley.

  • For those who tried to enter the dating pool, how did it go?

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  • “Enter[ing] the dating pool” puts way too much pressure on the situation. I just go out looking to meet interesting people and make friends. Eventually I’ll meet someone where things feel different and we’ll both want to get to know each other more than most of the people we meet. That’s how I met my current partner four months ago.

    That said, we did meet while going to events in our local kink scene. That’s a more unique environment where everyone understands that conversations have a high likelihood to be sexual and any kind of judgmental attitude is frowned upon by the community. It makes it way easier to be comfortable and confident in a conversation.

    Dating apps are evil. I avoid them like the plague. Yeah it may feel “safer” to swipe through strangers on an app, but you’re really just trading your mental health (and whatever information the corpos collect) for the illusion of safety. Going out and putting yourself out there is hard and scary, but it gets easier over time and the results are much better.

  • My therapist says she might have to report my abusive family to the authorities. How do I avoid being reported so the cops don't show up and make everything worse?

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  • I was in a similar situation a few years ago. I was in a psych ward and my caseworker wanted to send me to a shelter instead of going back to my family. At the time I worried that would just make everything worse, but I’ve been questioning whether I should’ve done it or not for a while since everything got worse anyway. Obviously I don’t know your whole situation, but sometimes people are just unstable and will get worse with your influence or not.

    As for how to hide it, I don’t know exactly what kinda wording you could use to talk about things. You could just avoid getting into detail about what your family actually does and just focus on how they make you feel.

  • When someone's telling you something in great detail that you already know about, do you: A) patiently listen and let them finish?

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  • I rarely find myself in this scenario, but depending on the situation I’ll either nod along and wait to add any points I have or will cut them off with a question.

  • Does anyone have any advice for young adults that are struggling in life?

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  • Everyone I know is struggling in life. It seems almost impossible to get anything good going. Take things one step at a time and try to find a good strategy for managing upkeep on whatever needs it. Focus on improving a single thing you can do in the short term. Outside of that, I’d strongly recommend getting a union job if you don’t have employment figured out yet. A stable income with good job security is much easier to plan around even if it seems like it isn’t enough money.

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    Permanently Deleted

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  • That depends on your priorities I guess. As long as we have compatible ideals and treat others similarly, then I’d give it a shot. I don’t necessarily want a partner who knows history or geography, just one that’s a good person I get along with and one that shares interests with me.

    On a side note, I’d personally refrain from calling anyone dumb. Schools aren’t perfect and this person has lived a whole life just like you. They have learned things, just not the same things. If they’re a 10/10, I imagine they probably know a lot about health, fitness, fashion, and maybe makeup. Those are all valid and useful things to know.

  • What are your top 5 anime shows?

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    1. Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood
    2. Cowboy Bebop
    3. Code Geass
    4. Durarara!!
    5. Devilman Crybaby

  • People who have been to psych wards before, how was it?

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  • They all vary pretty wildly from what I’ve heard. The one I spent 2 weeks in was mind-numbingly boring. No phones, no internet, and one hour of the wards ipad a day. The only saving grace was that I stole a water damaged deck of playing cards from some volunteer guy at the hospital I was initially put in before they transferred me. I played solitaire probably a couple thousand times over 2 weeks.

    Other than that, you pretty much just talk with other people there and watch TV. They did some kind of activity every day and if you didn’t it would take longer to get out. The activities were dumb little arts and crafts nonsense and a bunch of coloring. After a few days though, anything is better than nothing.

    In the ward I was in, medication was an issue for me. They put me on haldol and I had a really bad reaction to it, but the staff didn’t believe me until I couldn’t move and was in a lot of pain. Generally the staff doesn’t care much and will ignore lots of what you or anyone else says.

  • How do you successfully maintain a calorie deficit over the long run?

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  • You could make lots of jello. Easy, tastes good, fills you, and there’s nearly no calories. I personally just drink water when I crave snacks.

  • What's a time you stuck to your principles despite it being inconvenient to you?

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  • Yeah, I get what you’re saying. My therapist has said something similar. That said, these things will never have no emotional toll. Nothing in life is free. To be totally detached isn’t being there for someone and that wouldn’t be the right way to handle these situations either.

    I appreciate the advice and the time you spent on it, but I do what I do because it’s what the person I want to be would do. Until I don’t want to be the kind of person that cares about even the people that have done wrong by me, I’m gonna keep doing it. I still live my life, pursue my goals, and take care of myself. I just sacrifice a little energy and peace of mind for the people in my life that need it when they need it.

  • What's a time you stuck to your principles despite it being inconvenient to you?

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  • It’s really not a healthy way to live. Plenty of people have told me to cut back on it, including two therapists. I’ve kinda understood that view, but I get stuck at the question of who is worth being there for and who isn’t.

  • What's a time you stuck to your principles despite it being inconvenient to you?

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  • I don’t burn bridges with anyone. I grew up very isolated and alone and decided early in life to never be part of making people in my life feel that way.

    I was the only one to visit my mom at the psych ward despite it being far and us not getting along.

    I picked up an abusive ex from a date that had gone terribly wrong late at night.

    I stayed on the phone with another toxic ex for a few hours as they nervously went home from a party in a bad area.

    There’s lots more examples and it’s pretty much always a pain in the ass, but everyone should have someone to go to. I’m not necessarily nice or dishonest about my feelings, but I won’t leave people hanging.

  • Should I start a blog?

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  • Odds are, starting out with a fresh blog will be pretty slow to build up any kind of regular readership. You gotta do it because you’re passionate about the topics and enjoy writing. You won’t need to worry about AI if you have both of those traits, because you’re doing it for the sake of your own creative expression and it will naturally have a human quality that can’t be emulated.

  • What do you still use reddit for?

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  • 100% Lemmy. If I end up on reddit, it’s because I googled something.

  • Americans, what do typically have for breakfast?

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  • Coffee and bacon, egg, and cheese on a plain bagel. I eat that pretty much every work day.

  • What's that longest time you went without eating? Why?

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  • I went roughly 2 weeks without food after I got out of the hospital from a severe head injury. I tried to eat, but I temporarily lost my sense of taste and my brain hallucinated this absolutely terrible taste in its place. Even my saliva and the inside of my mouth had this taste. In the hospital I mostly got my nutrients via IV.

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    People aged 25+ How often do you hang out/see friends?

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  • I’m 28. I hang out with one friend at least 1-3 times a week. I see the rest of them once every few months, but we’re all in discord pretty frequently. I also have friends in the local kink scene I see relatively often depending on how many events I go to.