Thanks for the added context and providing a link for folks! It's a decent commencement speech overall and I appreciate the attention he draws to the importance (and difficulty) of perspective in it. If anyone understood the "great and terrible truth" of the adage, it would be him.
Textile work and sewing. I love working with fabrics and turning a flat piece of cloth into a usable/wearable object. It also gives me a feeling of connection to the flow of human history. When I'm sitting in my craft room, hand stitching a hem or working on a piece of embroidery, I often think about the fact that the physical movements I'm making with my body have been shared across human cultures and time. The pulling of a needle and thread through fabric is a mirror of the human tapestry we all create together.
Textile work! Could be sewing, weaving, dying, etc. I love working with fabrics and making them into usable 3D objects. Recently, as in the last two weeks, I've started working with wool felt with the vague idea of making insect brooches but I ended up making a cat toy instead lol.
I had the fortunate experience of growing up with great-grandparents living, as well as some of their siblings. I got to hear first-hand experiences from 3 generations of women (mother, grandmothers, and two great-grandmothers plus various aunts sprinkled in). It was invaluable for me. Knowing their life stories and the truth of what they endured has helped me navigate life in so many ways.
It also has been incredible armor against the flood of misplaced nostalgia and outright manipulation of history that seems so prevelant. My great-grandmother was born in 1908 and died in 2002. She left her abusive husband in the 1930s and raised her kids as a single mom in a time when it was exponentially more difficult to do so. Glad she got out when she did with 4 instead of 14...
For anyone confused and making "parenting is hard and parents do their best" apologetics in the comments, this comic portrays long term, systematic child abuse and survivors recognize it immediately. If a parent's "best" involves abuse of any kind, it simply isn't good enough, and no victim owes their abuser a single thing.
For any fellow survivors, I see you and it's not your fault. They made choices when they raised you in a climate of terror, abuse, blame, and cruelty, you had no choice. Leave them to the natural consequences of their choices, your one wild life is your own, don't let them take any more of it than they already have.
I have strong reactions to cold. My hands and feet won't warm back up and begin to sting and ache. My back, neck, shoulders, and jaw clench and tighten to the point that it becomes painful. Once I get properly cold, it doesn't matter how many pairs of socks I wear or if I have extra sweaters, the pain continues until I can either take a hot shower/bath to warm back up. I've been like this since I was a kid.
I live in the south of the US currently, and summers here are hot and humid, fairly brutal at times. I fully recognize that it gets very uncomfortable outside during the summer. I don't, personally, think that it means we need to keep the AC at full blast on its lowest setting all day long like my coworkers do. But I'm definitely in the minority and so summers are painful for me. I usually take several walks around the block to try and warm up throughout the day. If the pain gets bad enough, I'll use a small space heater or a heating pad to relieve the pain until I can get home.
I honestly miss living in Madrid where AC was not the general rule and, though hot at times, I rarely got the cold tension shivers that I get all the time here in the South. On the other hand, my partner and I save so much money on utilities in the summer compared to my friends and coworkers cause we use the AC sparingly. So benefits and drawbacks I guess. Crazy how different we all are!
I like to decorate mine! Our previous one rusted out so I painted the numbers onto our new one (instead of using stickers) and then painted gold ginko leaves all over it with some bugs hiding around them.
Alcohol and I had quite a destructive relationship for all of my 20s and I am fortunate to have survived it. Got sober at 30, relapsed over Covid, clawed my way back, and coming up on my 5 year (take 2) anniversary in July. As a whole, I've been sober for 11 of the past 13 years and have no desire to pick up the bottle again.
My partner is a normal drinker in that he will have a single hard cider once or twice a month on a Friday while playing League with friends. I'm at the point where a six pack can sit in the fridge for a couple months and it doesn't phase me in the least. If he drank more and/or more frequently, I'd likely need to adjust some boundaries though.
I'm a firm believer that people should make their own choices and that what others do with their own bodies is no business of mine, but I do think there should be an increase in education around alcohol and it's physical, mental, emotional, and social/relational effects.
My mom died of breast cancer at 62 and was a heavy wine drinker. She kept drinking "moderately" (i.e. almost daily) after chemo and the first remission. Her cancer is not her fault, but I can't help but wonder if she would have had longer had she quit when she got the first diagnosis.
This is so tough. My partner's mother is a vicious manipulator and abuser, still tries to put her hands on her grown children. I love him so much and want to do my best to support him but I can't have a relationship with her. She's not permitted at our house because every time we've tried, she starts a toddler tantrum over whatever comes to mind and gets violent.
I worry it weighs heavily on him and I wish I could stomach more interaction with her, I imagine it would make his life easier in some ways. But I've hit my max when it comes to abusive people. I'm a domestic abuse survivor and I simply don't have any more space for folks who behave that way.
I'm legitimately glad that your personal experience of Christianity has been a net positive for you.
I was raised in a very standard First Assembly of God church until I was 12 and then my parents pivoted back to Catholicism. The experiences I had growing up in an evangelical paradigm were horrifying, especially in hindsight. I'm still unpacking the religious trauma in therapy today, nearly three decades after walking away.
So, based on my personal experience, the day to day Christians are precisely the greedy and violent ones that fucked me up, abused me relentlessly, and destroyed my sense of self-worth, not the blowhards on the news. Many of us are walking wounded from the divisive, hate-based, soul-crushing doctrines we were raised in under the guise of Christian love.
So, I'm not into words or images from pop culture etc. (that's just my taste, I think people should get what they like regardless) but I have three larger pieces on me. All three are original artwork by the artist, I gave them an idea of the general imagery/vibe I was going for and then handed them the reins. Also chose someone who's dominant art style correlated with the style I wanted. I love art and it makes me happy to carry beautiful and original artwork with me wherever I go.
My mom died 5 months ago from MBC at 62. I was fortunate enough to be with her for the last few days. My husband and I drove overnight to get there, my brother and his partner did the same. My father and my aunt and us all took turns sitting with her, caring for her, doing everything we could to surround her with comfort and love.
The night she passed, we were all in the living room, she was in a hospital bed at this point, and we were all seated around her, watching a movie. She had been unconscious for days at that point but, for some reason, I had this feeling that she was looking at me. Logically, I know she wasn't and that she was unconscious etc. But it still felt that way and I looked over at her and no one else was looking, they were all glued to the screen, I'm struggling to explain this but it felt like for a moment, everything stopped and her and I were alone in the room.
I blew her a kiss and waved goodbye, it was such a tender moment and somehow felt so intimate despite everyone being there. No one else noticed, it was just her and I for that brief moment. We were close and loved each other a lot, imperfectly at times, but a lot. I'm so grateful for that memory.
She took her last breath about 30 minutes later. We surrounded her bedside, held her hands and feet, I stroked her face and whispered to her as she slipped away. Yet, it was that brief, time-frozen moment when it felt like we said goodbye to each other that really wrecks me and comforts me at the same time. I miss her a lot. Fuck cancer.
"Cause love's such an old-fashioned word
And love dares you to care for
The people on the edge of the night
And love dares you to change our way of
Caring about ourselves
This is our last dance
This is our last dance
This is ourselves
Under pressure."
Thanks for the added context and providing a link for folks! It's a decent commencement speech overall and I appreciate the attention he draws to the importance (and difficulty) of perspective in it. If anyone understood the "great and terrible truth" of the adage, it would be him.