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Posts
12
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361
Joined
3 yr. ago

  • Hah ! Speech therapy was what I thought! I used to be an SLT, but you probably know more than me about a bunch of things, because it's been a while...

  • Got a Shark cannister vacuum and I love it. Very powerful, easy to clean, and it's my first vacuum with lights on the head which are surprisingly useful.

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  • that's a cool hobby! I used to love watching the parts of my tape deck move as a kid. Te parts clunking into pace, the gentle pace of the rotation. That's a very nice player you've got!

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  • Not a car guy, but it makes more sense to me than people who collect expensive watches. At least a car is fun to drive and goes vroom. A rolex is just some jewelery for guys.

  • I don't think it's very common, partners and flatmates have definitely (and understandably) been frustrated. When I was younger and used to smoke, my friends would be horrified that I wouldn't tap ash into the an ashtray, but just into the floor or couch I was sitting on. It wasn't intentional, I don't like getting ash over myself (or having to pick up envelopes, or find socks scattered over the house) but if I was occupied by a conversation or even just thinking about something, it would happen without my noticing.

    But to be fair, I have adhd, so I've got a bunch of issues around attention and impulse control. It's a tiresome habit, and I'm definitely not condoning it. I'm just so glad that I don't act like that outside my home. There I'm just normal levels of thoughtless, like forgetting to use coasters.

  • Not to justify littering in the slightest (it's gross and I don't do it) but I think I can give you an insight in some of the thinking. Because in my own home, I frequently and unthinkingly 'litter' even though it annoys me! I open an envelope and read the letter, unconsciously dropping the envelope on the floor. I constantly find empty food packaging in weird places because as soon as I'm done with it I just drop it.

    Fortunately I don't do this in public because I'm always more aware of my actions when I'm out of my own space. But within my home, if I'm doing something while focusing on something else I'm prone to abandoning things carelessly, and when I find them latter I'll be mad at having to tidy up after myself. So, maybe some folks are like that in public? Also, some folks consciously and shamelessly litter, and there's really no excuse.

  • Good to see the great art of conversation is still with us.

    • 25-30 living with a flatmate, seeing friends and being sociable & fun all the time, probably 6 days a week on average.
    • In my 30s, living alone, having a longer commute and more responsible job, still made the effort to see different friends, with something bigger (dinner or game night) once a week. So seeing folks 3 / 7 days.
    • 40s moved with partner to a different country. So now it's seeing friends 4 times a year when I go home, and another 2 or 3 times when they come visit. Definitely less than I'm happy with, and sometimes it's a source of frustration, but it's mostly OK. It's nice having the different experience of having a friend stay for a week, feels a little like being a teen when friends would sleep over.

    I need to improve my language skills so I can spend time with my partners friends here. But because of demands of life, work, renovations, etc I think that even if my friends lived around, it would be closer to once/twice a week. Also, it's worth noting that as well as having lots of good friends who enjoy spending time with each other, I'm lucky to have lots of friends without kids or busy careers. One of my closest friends has both those things, and we really struggle to even fit a videocall in. But my autistic crafter buddy is good for a chat and a cup of tea anytime.

  • Wow. I'm in the middle of renovating a house, and I now I'm going to have to talk my partner into having a designated Bridge room somewhere...

  • I'd simulate being on the Enterprise with my space pals and doing fun stuff on the holodeck.

  • Yeah, I think the answer it that question tell you more about the person's attitude to normalcy / weirdness than how normal they are. Like you say, lots of people want to be normal (or don't want to be seen as weird) so will present themselves that way, and keep all their divergence secret because it's shameful.

    But there's also those people who genuinely don't realise that people are different from them, or what most people are like. They belive that however they are is 'normal' and everyone who disagrees is wrong, even if they're in the minority.

  • Sex can be fun, but tbh a lot of it is pretty underwhelming, especially if you don't understand each other, put in some effort or have good chemistry. When my partner and I are on holiday or have lots of free time we often have sex three or four times a day. But that's not because it's always mind-blowing, most of the time it's just a fun thing to do together.

    The 'horny man' thing is a bit different. There's a kinda of arousal and drive that isn't really about the objective fun of sex, but the sense of pursuit. There's people I've slept with where the specific sextime wasn't necessarily amazing, but I had a huge crush on them and the feeling of satisfaction from finally hooking up was amazing. For me, that's usually pretty innocent "oh wow, I didn't know they liked me!" , but for some guys it's about perceived status in quite a douchey Andrew Tate kinda way.

    There's also the genuine instinctual drive aspect. Times where I've not had sex in a while, and been thinking about it a lot (like visiting a long distance partner) it can make me pretty crazy. Especially if you do edging or orgasam denial, you can end up in a pretty delirious place. When that has built up for a while I definitely get to the stage where I will do super reckless things just to get release. For me, that's never a big problem because I only get in that state through choice, if I'm not planning on having sex with my partner I'll just jerk off and the urgency is gone. But the experience has given me a bit of understanding of why men sometimes do terrible and destructive things because of sex. I can literally feel my brain shutting down, and all sense of consequences disappearing.

  • Same, when I read I 'hear' it as a voice in my head. And yeah, I can't imagine enjoying reading without hearing that intonation and emphasis.

    I can 'skim read' if I need to find something in an article, but that's like doing a word search of something, glancing at paragraphs and looking for specific key words. It's not enjoyable and it doesn't make me think deeply about the text, even if I could probably summarise the content of article to someone afterwards.

  • Not judging other people. Partly, I'm just quite easy going, partly I've had enough personal history of making mistakes to understand that people often have others reasons for their actions. But mostly I just don't see the point in wasting headspace caring about someone's appearance, opinion or behaviour.

    But I feel like I'm constantly hearing people bitching, moaning and picking at other people. There are situations where you need to take a decision about something (particularly if you're in a position of responsibility or authority) but most of the time there seems very little point in being judgemental about someone.

  • Tbh, the main enjoyment I get from skyrim is installing it every few years and screwing around with mods to get the perfect setup. Then once I actually start playing I quickly bored and stop.

    In general, it's easier to get dopamine from the anticipation of a game, actually enjoying the game requires some work and a habit. Sometimes it's just too much, especially if you're feeling a bit burnt out from exams.

  • Is matrix not more like chat channels? I'm lookint for something more like a forum / threaded conversations. Do you think it supports that sort of thing?

  • Mid 40s, and I don't think colds and stuff have changed much. But it's a little hard to tell as I'm almost always floored by those sorts of things. When I was younger I'd just stay in bed all day, now I have shit that needs done so I have to soldier through. So if anything I've become more functional when sick, even if it feels just as awful.

    But for sprains and pains, it's much worse. Any sort of overuse or careless maneuver can lead to weeks of issues. Whether that's specifically age, or just decreasing physical strength and flexibility (I'm very phsycially active, but never do sports or fitness or stretching) is uncertain.

  • I could self host a forum, but I l assumed it'd be complicated. Is there an option that's easy to implement?

  • Does discord have threaded conversation? Isn't it just messages in channels?