I'm a beginner currently doing exactly the same thing, plus a but more.
For the server I'm using Proxmox as a hypervisor, which let's me experiment with various OS's as I choose. For my phone, I have a pixel with GrapheneOS, which I love.
Very similar to IRC from what I understand, but a different and newer system designed to work with the current fediverse. I haven't fiddled with it yet, but im in the process of standing up a social media server for my family and friends and will likely be using it.
Just trying to weigh my options, so I figured if ask about IRC.
You know, I'm not sure. I imagine you can though, given that you can do other data intensive things like group video chat.
I might have to spin this up this weekend.