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  • I assume you’re talking about how Smith is used by neoclassical economists to justify made up stuff.

    For example, the idea of the invisible hand as a way of portraying perfect competition.

    Or his depiction of capitalism as a way of coordinating production without central authority: this is often used to legitimize inequality and environmental irresponsibility.

    But if we want to truly understand Smith, I think we have to look beyond that.

    Unfortunately, Smith has been made a caricature. Who made him into a caricature? Neoclassical economists in the 19th century and neoliberal or neoconservative figures in the 20th and 21st century. These other economists wanted to make capitalism sweeter-sounding. They wanted to make economics a tool for indoctrination.

    For example, his invisible hand idea comes up ONCE in Wealth of Nations. Yet this image was co-opted by people who do pro-capitalism indoctrination. When made a caricature, the invisible hand is an excellent rhetorical device to portray how supposedly perfect capitalism is.

    Another example is how Adam Smith actually advocates for industrial policies to build a nation’s industrial capacity. But these parts of Smith’s work are conveniently ignored by those who want elites to extract and hoard wealth (instead of investing in a whole nation).

    More broadly, Smith is the opposite of neoclassical economists in many ways. In my view, the most striking difference between both of them is curiosity. Smith looked at the world and tried to understand its mechanisms. On the other hand, neoclassical economists close their eyes and make up mechanisms.

    An example of this is the concept of perfect competition. This concept is loved by capitalist indoctrinators. So much so that it is the fairy tale that is taught to economist toddlers. It’s a weird sort of utopia for neoclassical economists. There’s no friction, no time, no complexity.

    You might think Smith is responsible for this absurd fairy tale, but I’d say he is decidedly not. For example, he discusses price dynamics not in terms of perfect equilibrium, but in terms of turbulent equalization. Another example is that he discusses competition not as a silly dance between capitalists, but as a battle to reduce costs (at all costs).

    This is not to say that Smith nailed everything. For example, he missed something about the nature of profits. He did notice that profits are directly related to production costs, including labor. But he did not recognize that the profit-wage ratio was historically determined in the way that Marx did.

    How could we interpret all of this?

    The way I see it, Smith laid the groundwork for future economists. Smith was the shoulders that future economists —proper economists— stood on.

    Unfortunately, he has also been co-opted by capitalist indoctrinators. But if these indoctrinators actually read Smith and the economists that he directly inspired, I’m sure economics would be much more of a science and less of a religion.

  • If you want to experience diversity in human experiences and landscapes, Samsara.

  • Sorry for the late response. I hope you have had time to process things and to learn a bit more about who you’d like to be now that you have a new path before you.

    Why do those exercises resonate with me? Because they seem effective for me. Sometimes I stop suffering altogether and can face difficult situations more flexibly. Sometimes the exercises punch me in the gut… and then I can face difficult situations more flexibly.

    I also know about Coherence Therapy, and I think the experiential exercises are exploiting the same mechanisms. In effect, you’re transforming schemas deeply, instead of simply trying to change by building new ones (while the old ones are still powerfully guiding your behavior). If you’re curious, we can talk about Coherence Therapy’s mechanisms and how ACT can exploit them.

    The take-away is that experiential exercises like the object one are taking advantage of your memory, your sensory apparatus, and your meaning-making capacity to make it easier for you to accept tough situations and choose who you’d like to be.

    As to exercises for guilt, I’d suggest something strange.

    First, I’d suggest the objects exercise or similar defusion exercises. That way, you can think flexibly beyond “I’m guilty”. Then, I’d suggest acceptance exercises like the wider view or the acceptance through perspective. That way, it becomes easier to experience that guilt without it tripping you up. I’d do self exercises like the acceptance through perspective. That way, you can build a sense of self that is greater than “I’m a guilty person”. Finally, I’d do values exercises such as values writing, drawing on sweetness, or flipping the pain. That way, you learn from your guilt and orient your life towards what you value.

    So, if you notice, I’m suggesting the same exercises as before, but I’m directing them towards the guilt itself.

    You can think of ACT as a toolset. A very effective one. And you can use its tools in different contexts. It’s just a matter of doing precisely that.

    I hope ACT and mindfulness can help!

    As always, feel free to ask :)

  • Amazing

  • Holy crap. You made me involuntarily lift my hand to cover my mouth as I said “Oh my god”. I’m glad everything was sorted

  • Writing can help sometimes. Totally. But it’s important to compare writing with the alternatives.

    Writing is painfully slow and requires loads of work. An example of this is the knowledge management literature: trying to encode an expert’s knowledge at some point becomes too expensive. That’s why working alongside masters of a discipline is so special: they know things that are hard to put into writing.

    Writing is also prone to mistakes. Businesses have learned this the hard way in the last half-a-century. Some tech businesses insisted that it was a matter of learning to write well. “Use this method of writing requirements”. “Use this framework for writing specifications”. But miscommunication still happened. Faced with this problem, Kent Beck and Jeff Patton found that what works most efficiently is for people to use narrative to talk about the problems at hand. In this context, documentation is useful to the extent that it helps in conversation.

    There’s also the fact that writing is a very context-poor method of communication. When talking, you’ve got much more to pick up on: the speed of the words, the spacing between the words, the pitch, the eyes, the mouth, the eyebrows, the head tilt, the hand positions, the foot positions, the general stance, etc. Additionally, when talking you can go back and forth, identifying and correcting misunderstandings much faster than with text.

    On top of that is the fact that OP is talking about a romantic context. This changes things a bit. This is the purview of psychology. Psychology also has a similar history to business: they both went from believing it’s a matter of teaching people to find the most precise technical language to believing it’s a matter of having conversations. But the conversations in business are not the same as in romance.

    Romance requires you to care about someone else’s vulnerability and for you to open up to them. And this is the most powerful way of reassuring both of you and being securely attached. This is the insight of emotion-focused therapy.

    So that’s how I see writing.

    It can contribute to shared meaning, but it requires plenty of work and yet it consistently leads to misunderstandings. These misunderstandings can be dealt with faster with conversation. If the context of the conversation is romantic, the most important thing someone can do is open up to their partners and care for their partners’ vulnerability.

    Of course, what I like about your comment is that it recognizes the limitations of text. And, of course, if used well, it can help.

  • Crucial Conversations and Sue Johnson’s book/workbook on conversations. Can’t recommend those enough. They’ve changed my life

  • First of all, I'm so sorry for your loss. I really hope you can find meaning in this situation and use it as a way of learning what you want more of in life.

    I think the goal right now is for you to live a good life, one in which you're the kind of person that you want to be.

    When you say that you "try to sit with [your] feelings as they happen", I'm really glad that you're doing that. It's not easy. But the alternative causes much more suffering and doesn't teach you what's meaningful in your life. Also, when you say that "[you're] in therapy", I'm also glad. Therapy, when it's good, makes accepting hard realities easier.

    I have also gone through losses and had nightmares immediately after the loss. In fact, this happened to me in November 2025. The night after my loss I woke up breathing intensely. My eyes were wet, almost as if I was crying while asleep. I woke up in the middle of a gasp, as if I was about to start screaming. It sucked.

    Eventually, I was able to sleep normally again. And, as you mentioned, everyone is different.

    There are things that you can do, but I want to emphasize something that you probably already know: the pain cannot magically go away. Why? Because you cared about her. Because now that she isn't here, you're reconstructing your self, your expectations, and your everyday life. And that reconstruction process is painful. As you rebuild these parts, the pain will gradually go away. But trying to avoid it will cause more suffering.

    I will not dwell in this point, because you already know it. Instead let's talk about what you can do.

    You can actually work on accepting this new reality. You can be deliberate about it. I tend to suggest acceptance and commitment therapy exercises. They are evidence-based and they have worked for me and countless others. You can find some exercises here.

    However, in my experience, not all exercises are the same. Some are more powerful for me. In particular, I think there's a massive difference between experiential exercises and merely verbal exercises. The experiential ones are more transformative for me.

    Which experiential exercises would I recommend? There's a couple in Steven C. Hayes' book A Liberated Mind:

    • In defusion, there's "Look at it as an object".
    • In acceptance and self, there's "Applying Perspective-Taking to Acceptance".
    • In presence there's good ol' mindfulness, which will definitely help you right now.
    • In values there's "values writing" and "flipping pain into purpose". Both will help you learn from this experience and help you take steps towards living the kind of life that you want to live.

    In that same book, there's an example of someone who had nightmares with a dinosaur. ACT helped them deal with those nightmares.

    As always, I want to say that not everyone clicks with ACT and there are many ways of accepting tough situations and committing to who we want to become.

    I hope this is helpful and feel free to ask questions.

    If you're a hug person, I send you a big ol' hug via Lemmy. I also wish the best for you.

  • Ah. Thanks for the target audience explanation.

    What I mean with Mastodon is that, immediately after "Social networking that's not for sale", you see more sentences: "Your home feed should be filled with what matters to you most, not what a corporation thinks you should see. Radically different social media, back in the hands of the people."

    I think the technical details, such as open source and federation are not going to click with people who don't know those ideas. However, open source and federation can create something that, for those people, is valuable.

    So the question is: what does Lemmy offer that clicks with people who don't know technical details?

    This is up for discussion, of course. But I'd argue there's "freedom", "choice", "human (and not corporate) communities", "made for people, not for profits"…

    That leads me to my suggestion:

    A discussion platform that is truly free. You choose your feed, not a corporation. You choose where to set up your account, not a corporation. You choose what communities to be a part of, not a corporation.

    or

    A discussion platform that is truly free. You choose your feed. You choose where to set up your account. You choose what communities to be a part of. You choose, not a corporation

    The bolded text is like Mastodon's first sentence. The rest of the text is like Mastodon's other sentences.

    The technical details can be explained later in the page, just like Mastodon does it.

  • I'm glad you all have experimented and found what works for you all!

    Your evening-morning setup sounds great! I do something similar, brewing all the coffee I'll drink throughout the day in a single batch. That way I control my caffeine intake and I have tasty coffee no matter where I go!

  • I wouldn't worry too much about it.

    I've had moments in my life where I sit down and cry for a long while and it physically hurts afterwards. I get headaches, my eyes hurt and get puffy, my stomach hurts from all those contractions…

    And it's normal, in the sense that crying is something people do. You're not alone.

    But still, it's not fun. Crying hurts.

    I'd only be concerned if I got those symptoms randomly, without even crying.

    Beyond the physical concerns, I hope you're doing alright. I don't know what you're going through, but I hope you can find meaning and love.

  • I figured that’s the joke, isn’t it?

    Also, I’m in the same boat. My current one does it whenever someone uses water elsewhere in the flat.

  • This. I’ve seen something relatively similar in my partner. They work with all kinds of people, sometimes people in their 40s, 50s, or beyond. These people, unfortunately, often don’t take my partner seriously. However, this changes when my partner appears older by using old-looking makeup, hair style, and clothes.

  • This totally happens in code where functions have plenty of side effects. And thats why functional programming can lead to fearless refactoring!

  • I agree with you that hobbies often enshittify. However, coffee has a special place in my heart because you can make really, really tasty coffee with simple tools.

    My setup is a plastic cone, a set of filter papers, a plastic kettle, a thermometer, a dispersion screen, and a scale.

    As to grinding coffee, you’re right that a grinder is expensive. There’s no way around that. However, you can do what my partner and I did for months: our local coffee shop ground our coffee each week.

    Why am I saying all of this?

    In part because I agree with you. I actually approach coffee deliberately with an 80/20 mindset: I’ll get 80% of the coffee goodness for 20% of the effort. I do this because I don’t want to get sucked into the deep end.

    And I think you could get a lot of coffee goodness for very little effort. Coffee ratios are a great way to start. You take just a few steps so that you can play around with temperature, grind size, and pouring technique. In my mind, that’s the 20% that gets me 80% of coffee goodness.

    Of course, it’s possible that you like your current setup and that’s great! I believe the best coffee is the coffee that you like.

  • Defcon: Everybody Dies

    That game has actually been studied by scientists, because it changes people’s attitudes towards nuclear weapons.

    The game literally is about using nuclear weapons to win.

    How does it look? It isn’t overly grotesque. There are no melting faces, no devastated landscapes. Nothing. It’s just a minimalist map of the world.

    You might hear that and think that it’s a pro-war game. But it actually has the opposite effect on players.

    How can it be? Simple. The game is accurate in how swiftly it all ends if there is a nuclear war. And by playing it, that truth is engraved into players’ intuitions.

    https://www.academia.edu/6697989/Education_from_inside_the_bunker_Examining_the_effect_of_Defcon_a_nuclear_warfare_simulation_game_on_nuclear_attitudes_and_critical_reflection

  • I'd love to edit my previous post but I don't wanna spam you.

    As to target audiences, I think it could be helpful to specify the personas that we're building the sentences for. Does the persona know what the Fediverse is? Do they know what enshittification is? Do they know what open source is? Do they have strong opinions about surveillance capitalism (even if they don't know the word for it)? Or are they clueless regarding all of these topics?

    My suggestion assumes some knowledge of these topics. To be clear, if I'd single out a suggestion of mine, it'd be:

    A discussion platform that can't enshittify. You choose your feed. You choose where to host your account.

  • The best sentence will depend on the target audience. Is there a way to know who would be that audience?

    Also, responding more directly to your question, I've got a frame challenge: What about two or three short sentences, like what Mastodon does?

    A platform that is truly democratic. You choose your feed. You choose where to host your account.

    A platform where you're truly free. You choose your feed. You choose where to host your account.

    A platform that can't enshittify. You choose your feed. You choose where to host your account.

    That third one I like, because it's a differentiator that Lemmy has in comparison with ButterflyX or whatever Jack the Twitter Guy is working on right now; Lemmy is not at risk of enshitifying, unlike ButterflyX.

    Also, if it's important to differentiate Lemmy from Mastodon or other Fediverse platforms, the sentences could start with "A discussion platform".

    Also, here's a take where I tried to make no reference to electronics:

    A bustling room filled with tables, each filled with people talking about what they find interesting, where the conversation topics are always chosen by the table and always changing, and where you're free to set up your own tables with your own topics.

    or, more succinctly,

    A bustling room filled with tables, where each table is filled with people talking about what they find interesting, a room where you're free to set up your own tables with your own topics.

    Also, I just realized that every time that I edit this post you get notified becase I @ed you. Sorry!

    And, finally, happy cake day, @nutomic@lemmy.ml!

  • If you’re interested in Cypher or Apocalypse World, you’re in luck. Both are being updated as we speak and will be re-released this year!

    Apocalypse World changed my life, at least my TTRPG life. The GMing chapter alone is worth the whole book’s price.

    As to computers being in charge of crunch and granularity in TTRPGs, I’m glad that that’s possible. It makes crunchier games more accessible.

    Heck, maybe in the future there’ll be a TTRPG that requires software to make complicated calculations. It could enable complex game economies, economies of battle, of skills, of inventory… — economies that aren’t easy to manage with mental math.

    For now, I think I’ll stick to accessibility and simplicity. Still, I’m excited to see what kinds of great games people will come up with!