Yeah, inceldom has coopted the word
Only if we let them, and anyone who does is an incompetent advocate choosing to let sexists decide the meaning of words for everyone else when everyone else has at least as much power to do otherwise. It's complacent cooperation with the enemy that purports ethical superiority while being the opposite.
Older activists who understood the pitfalls of establishing their own stigmatization in the language at least had the sense not to cooperate with their enemies. They'd more creatively reappropriate or reclaim words or embrace them as terms of pride. That lesson seems lost here.
that's lemmy in a nutshell
even when they can do something purely through online expression like fix an inaccessible post, they'll often still not do it: they'll argue over it, offer nonexcuses (eg, their shitty lemmy app lacks basic features available from the website to edit posts & provide text alternatives), not fix their post, keep posting inaccessible content. these are the same people blasting each other about leftist causes, which sometimes ironically include accessibility.
they're social justice imposters