Listens to too much music
Loves to grow shit
Alive by the grace of dairy products
Was reading through this thread and wanted to say idk wtf these other people are flipping out about. I have owned cats for 15 years and not once have I ever bothered to trim nails on any cat I have had in my care. It's a pain in the ass for me and for them, and I have never in all those years had any health issues arise from not trimming. The other people are right that trimming is different than declawing. Declawing is indeed very uncool, but trimming is not harmful as long as you don't trim into the quick of the nail. However, maintaining that it's an absolute necessity is simply wrong. At best, it's nice for us humans because they are less likely to scratch you on accident (or on purpose if your cat is an asshole) or less able to fuck up your furniture. And while I haven't ever had a cat who needed trimming for health reasons, I can acknowledge it's not an impossibility so maybe there are specific scenarios where trimming is required.
Also, I kinda thought all cat owners knew this but per the meltdowns of some other people responding to you, apparently not; cats naturally shed their nails. There are layers to each nail, and when the outermost sheath is loose enough, scratching on something pulls it away. It's not bloody or painful, it's totally natural. If you give cats plenty of scratching post toys around the house, the act of scratching on those posts will help them to maintain their own nail health without the stress of me having to restrain them for clipping. Sure my cats have sharp claws, but tbh they know how to control their claws and I almost never get scratches from them. I'd say the only times I get scratched is if one of them is on my lap and something surprises them, like the doorbell ringing or the dogs suddenly barking, causing the cat to launch off my lap, lol.
To start, I am not an expert, just a single 30 year old woman who has had cats for a long time (wait, does that make me an expert??), so this is just my two cents.
I wouldn't call that a full on spat, tho it may have escalated if you hadn't intervened so it's hard to say, but overall I wouldn't worry too much about that specific interaction. My two occasionally get in worse disagreements, often because Hashi is a gremlin (who I love, but fr he has a lot of vinegar) and has a strong inclination to intrude on Ripley's space. Despite Ripley having to occasionally tell Hashi to fuck off, they still get along great like, 97% of the time.
Just reading body language, neither seemed to be too stressed out or upset. I feel like the feeding set up is a great way to give them positive associations with each other while ensuring they both have the ability to retreat if they want to. You could also take one of your resident cat's beds or favorite blankets and place it in the foster's space, ane vice versa, so that they can smell/investigate and get used to the other cat without actually being near each other. This plus time is the way I have introduced new cats to resident cats. The time will depend on how social- or not- either cat is, but more often than not they will acclimate eventually.
They are both adorable, btw 😍
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Clematis
I hate when the internet eats a classic clip. Hopefully this tangentially related episode of Next Time on Lonny helps?
Mood. There was a time I was standing in line at the post office and some haggard looking mother was doing her best to calmly reign in her child who was busy running away from her, screeching and pulling over every display he could reach, and having zero regard for anyone else in the vicinity. I could see her exhaustion and I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I usually just grit my teeth and try to ignore it until I can escape, but this time I cut off the kids path when he got close, said "Stop" in the harshest tone I could muster, and ngl was pretty pleased with myself when he went crying to his mom. I did realize in that moment, tho, that I probably shouldn't have kids.
I didn't interpret their use of the word individualistic as an assertion that those who choose to be child-free are selfish. Selfish has a negative connotation to it that I don't feel they were going for. I think they were just contrasting that while being a parent requires putting yourself aside and focusing on a different human, being child-free allows a person to focus on their individual goals, whims, what have you.
I also agree with you that there is nothing wrong with a person choosing not to have kids, and there's a lot of reasons to pick from. For me, those are:
•I have never yearned for motherhood
•I find pregnancy impressive from a biological perspective but at the same time horrific and something I never want to go through
•I am prone to depression which makes it hard for me to care for myself on a consistent basis so I am not going to bring another life into this world only to be too swamped in self-loathing to take care of them
•I detest humanity, we have spent our entire existence as a species ravaging the earth as well as each other and I see no end to it. I hate that realistically I will have to watch people be cruel to each other for the rest of my life and have decided not to create another human who has to trudge through this hellscape which undoubtedly will only be worse off in their future
All came outta nowhere lightning fast and they kicked Chuck Norris in his cowboy ass
I'm probably not the best person to explain the party's structure because I am just some degen who finally got mad enough at the world to pull out of my depression doomscrolling, but my understanding is that it's not a party specifically owned/run by unions. Rather, the people running for office must run with the endorsement of at least one labor union, if not more. It was founded sometime in November by 3 people but they are currently working on registering the party and filling out structure, and plan to flesh out platform and policies post-holidays. FWIW, when I popped into the discord to see what was going on, it was like 580 people there, now a couple weeks later it's at 717. Their goal is to start getting people on ballots at the local levels as soon as possible, ideally challenging unopposed Rep/Dem candidates, and only later after there are many Labor Party candidates in offices nationwide will they try for a presidential nominee. Until then, there are channels for every state so people can organize with their state peers. I recognize that it is a young party and it's hard to say how things will go, but it feels better to work with them on what the workers in this nation need instead of melting further into my couch while reading yet another headline about Dems not following through and Repubs being sadistic pedophilic billie-sucking fucks.
It's fledgling, but check out https://www.votelabor.org/ It's a small but growing group of Americans who want to start a party that advocates for the working class. I jumped in yesterday and am gonna try to do my part. There's channels for every state to organize amongst their state peers, national channels for overall organization, policy discussions currently under debate, and desire to start getting people on ballots and in seats as soon as possible
Girl, I am saying this with so much love and compassion for you- any person who is worried about body count is not worth your time. Him asking alone would be enough of a red flag for me that I would be telling him we're done if I were in your shoes. And then when he hears 5, he is sobbing? Massive red flag, I don't care how nice he may seem, he is not mature enough to be in a relationship and you deserve better.
Sex is just a thing that two consenting adults can do, you having sex before you met him is nothing to be ashamed of, especially if you are practicing safe sex. It's also pretty unhealthy for you to take on the burden of his shame over your sexual life. If you were able to get him to come back, I fear his jealousy and insecurity would be riddled throughout your relationship. I spent all of my 20's in relationships with insecure men (I am a cishet woman) and I want to try to advise you against making a similar mistake. I could have been enjoying those ten years either on my own, or trying to find someone who really valued me. But instead I took on their problems and when I look back on my twenties I SO FUCKING WISH I had broken up with those men sooner (it was 2 long term relationships, one was 6 years, the other was ~3.5 years). I don't know how old you are, but I get a young vibe and I just want you to know that you will find someone who sees your beauty and isn't worried about such trivial things. "Forced love the worst love, throw that shit in the can." -a line from YBN Cordae's song Family Matters https://youtu.be/j8Xg0Y60Tr4
As for messaging people for money and some of the concerns about breaking his trust (as well as being accosted by online horndogs), the best you can do is learn from that outcome. I am not going to shit on people who sell companionship, whether that's just chatting, pics, or otherwise, but as you have found, men online who engage in this trade are dick pic machines. My personal takeaway is that whatever money you made was not worth the stress and the damage it wrought in your personal life. I won't, and can't, tell you not to do it, but to me it doesn't seem worth it.
Take care of yourself first and foremost, and know your value 💖